Monday, June 1, 2009


A 1905 farmhouse came up for sale this weekend in the Greenlake neighborhood. The property is a whopping 8500 square feet--about a double lot. There is already a grape arbor, raised beds, and a chicken run on the property. Of course, it's .75 million so wayyyy out of our budget.

Still, I saw this property and fetlt whta I hear is most likey the same sensation that women get lookin' at babies. Utter desire and lust from deep within me. I covet it badly. It isn't even because it is an old farmhouse, but it's the amount of land available in the city. I could easily feed us on that amount of land. Of course, I can't have a cow or even a goat or even my dream of 3 little sheep...but I could have enough chickens to keep us in eggs year 'round and a nice bee hive to provide honey.

What I want in life is so simple and yet, such a pipe-dream living where I do. Sure, there is the *big* dream of having my house and 5 acres and a goat and 3 sheep and maybe a cow and plenty of bees on one of the islands in San Juan county. I'd be happy for a little dream of an acre, even. Even less, perhaps.

It feels so impossible. It's still difficult to realize that if we could move East or South, we could easily afford to have the land I so desperately want. There is no family business out East or South and we can't look that gift-horse in the mouth.

And really, only one of us dreams to be a self-sufficient micro-farmer.

I find it ridiculous that I want simply to live simply and in a large city, one can't do that without also worrying about things like driving forever to get to work. Spending a lot of time in a car also defeats my self-sufficency dreams.

I wonder, sometimes, if I'm just another middle-class, soft-hand, more intellectual than handy, Jewish, female who romanticizes doing for oneself. I've had bits and pieces of this dream for the last 15 years that just get stronger and more insistent the longer I'm on this planet.

1 comment:

  1. Oh, Honey, I can relate, except my dreams specifically round to one place on the planet where no one else but me feels the sometimes screaming, always-thrumming connection. And it sounds so pathetic, unsubstantial, and pipe-dreamy compared to your noble hope. To be self-sufficient is the brass-ring, in my mind. To be independent and capable means everything else coming to you is a nice, happy bonus.

    Keep that voice singing in your veins, my Love. It's there for a reason; it's simply a matter of time when the situation will present itself. Your beautiful, driving hope to live off your own land is instinctive, intuitive, and meant to be. It'll happen.


"Every morning I awake torn between a desire to save the world and an inclination to savor it. This makes it hard to plan the day."

-E.B. White

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